friends with benefits

i have the nicest ass you've ever seen
and my body is amazing (so u keep saying)
u look at me with lust in your eyes
and all u cant think of is how much u want me

u have the friendliest eyes
and the nicest smile
i look at u with want in my eyes
but all i want from u is your heart

we hook up and things get out of hand
we go further than we shud
at first i regret it
but the next morning i secretly hope it will be the start of something great

three days has passed and still no word from u
then suddenly a msg saying "thanx i had fun"
deep down i no its no romantic line
but i still hold on to the belief that mayb it is

FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS IS WOT U WANT
no complicated drawn out commitment
FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS IS ALL U HAVE TO GIVE
no promise of a future

i realise that all i am is great intimacy
and love is not want u are interested in
i realise that im making a fool of myself
by hoping that u will want to be with me

the pain is unbearable
another mistake
havent i learnt enuf
havent i grown up

i walk into a quiet room
send u a msg saying "thanx ive had enuf"
close the door and 'BANG'
Its all over

FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS
thats not wot i am
FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS
now that im gone wot is left to benefit?

Crossed the line

Bold to admit
I did it
crossed the line
set in genesis inception
unfathomable reason
purpose divine.

24 May 2007

New day

As I look at myself today; and see what I was yesterday
I shudder in dismay, as yesterday I was a dreamer, an achiever and did not play
Now I play harder than I work and leave my assets on display
Brothers need not say I love you, but how much do I pay
Now my heart is frozen as frost in the winter of may
It seems like I lost myself some where along the way
and am grey. as grey as ash
Everyday to the Lord I pray
I pray for a new heart and a new day
A new day of hope and a tomorrow filled with no sorrow

Come Into My world Of Self Injury

Not many people, can understand how taking a sharp object and cutting yourself can make you feel better. Truth is that sometimes, you can not relieve yourself in the usual way,
like crying or shouting which most people do.
So cutting yourself helps relieve all the tension built up inside.
Your physical pain relieves your emotional pain,
because when you see the blood and experience the pain, it calms you down and helps you relax.
It also makes you feel alive, free, SAFE and grounded.
For as the blood starts oozing out, you get a huge rush.
Which gives you a rapid yet temporary relief,
and it is very comforting,
because at that moment, you feel as though you are in complete control of your situation.

No Turning Back

You're the prime victim of your own doings
You pulled off the thread of my woven conscience and desire
Now that someone has replenished the missing thread,
I'm being blamed and hated for being an admirer of my trusting rescuer

My love for a not so trusting person,
Brought my endless irreparable pain
My temper from my not so innocent heart,
Drove my impulsive non-regrettable actions
This is when hearts got broken and tears fell like waters of Victoria Falls

From the darkest back corner of your heart,
You'll soon realise he's been honest for the duration
Blaming yourself for stepping on the tail of a not yet dead Mamba,
Is what you'll have to deal with in your next life
By then, uLova would have already taken pothole-less avenues

If I was a Poet

If I were a poet I'd tell you how much I respect you
The drama, the issues, the nonsense I've put you through
I'd tell you it will all be alright one day
and that that night will be history someday

I'd show you good men do exist,
And that causing you drama was never on my list
I'd show you the sun hides behind every storm
And that in it's wake rainbows are born

I'd erase all that has been already said
and whisper words that you'll never forget
I'd tell you eternally we shall rise
and that the future is yours to shine

If I were a poet I’d hold your hand
And try to show you that I’m a true man
I’d make you see me for who I truly am
And that hurting you was never part of the plan

I’d get on one knee and apologise to you
Sometimes we men can’t see the things we do
Being all macho we’re blinded by ego
But from our mistakes we eventually grow

I’d explain to you that I need to find myself
Living sometimes feels like a daily Hell
I make mistakes, like the human I am
I look at me and realise I’m only a man

Roses grow from rains and storms
What feeds wisdom the heart still mourns
With growing up mistakes arise
And I saw my mistake in your very eyes

If I were a poet I'd write a poem
About a wonderful woman I have come to know
I'd put a few words together and write a verse
If I were a poet….if I were a poet I wouldn't feel like this