untitled thoughts

Is this designation my destination?
Wherein resignation isn’t my option
Then what life is there for me to live.
Strongly designed outside & poorly made inside
I wear a smile on my face
And inside me are walls of life falling apart.

Was I designed to be like this?
A tree alive at the top and dead at the bottom
If my inner me makes me a man
And if my inner me has parted me
Then I am a dead man living.
Was I designed to cry inside my belly?
While outer me laughs that my gums even show
Is this pretension my designation to my destination?
Whereas resignation is not my option.

This life is not mine; it was not made for me
I was not designed to be like this
Correct me if I am wrong, but if this life is mine,
then my life is a fake and I am a fake
And right now I know not which way to take
The air in spaces is at stake
For my heart is broken, the beauty of life is stolen
And swollen are spoken thoughts inside my head;
Depart this life.